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Post by kamaria on Jan 17, 2011 11:38:59 GMT -5
Kamaria frowned, and gently took one of Puck's hands in her own. "You can tell me anything," she murmured.
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Post by puck on Jan 17, 2011 11:47:50 GMT -5
"I know," Puck nodded, give Kam's hand a quick squeeze, "I'm just crap at actually figuring out how to say it."
Oh how she wished for a way for Kam to just know about everything so she could get this all over with.
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Post by kamaria on Jan 17, 2011 11:52:15 GMT -5
Kamaria smiled a small, encouraging smile. "Take your time, sweetie."
She was quite relieved Puck chose to go first. Her own issues were probably nothing compared to Puck's. She felt really rather stupid for being so upset over that dumb tomcat.
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Post by puck on Jan 17, 2011 12:21:58 GMT -5
"I... Its just... Its the same as always." Puck stumbled a bit, trying to figure out the best way to approach the subject. "The same thing that always happens, no matter where I go or what I do. I just..." Damnit, why did this have to be so hard to talk about?
Puck squeezed her eyes closed. Why did she have to be so stupid about all this? "Its basically just like what we talked about before. The night we met." Puck opened her eyes and looked at Kam out of the corner of her eye before turning her gaze back to her knees. "I don't like being like this, but no matter what it keeps coming back. I don't want to keep running away, but I don't know what else to do."
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Post by kamaria on Jan 17, 2011 12:26:39 GMT -5
"The list?" Kamaria asked quietly, almost a whisper. Her heart sank. She didn't want to let go of Puck's hand. "Run away? You... you want to leave?"
Kamaria didn't think she'd be able to bear it if Puck left. Anyone else she'd be sad to see leave, but she'd get over it. But not Puck. Not Puck.
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Post by puck on Jan 17, 2011 12:36:34 GMT -5
Puck nodded when Kam mentioned the list. The list and everything it stood for. She wished that getting rid of the list would get rid of all of her problems.
At Kamaria's question Puck's eyes opened wide. She hadn't realized what she had said until that moment, and she would have preferred to have kept that little tidbit hidden. Fuck...
"I... I don't want to leave," she muttered quietly, her stomach knotting up, "Sometimes it just seems like everyone would be better off without me around..."
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Post by kamaria on Jan 17, 2011 12:40:34 GMT -5
Kamaria's stomach was knotting up now, too. She could feel tears burning behind her eyes, too. She blinked furiously, trying to make them go away. Always with the tears. Stupid.
"Please don't say that," she said, her voice shaky. "I don't know what I'd do without you," she admitted.
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Post by puck on Jan 17, 2011 13:12:35 GMT -5
The guilt was building quickly. Puck turned to her friend and grabbed her other hand, though she still couldn't get herself to actually look at her eyes so she focused on their hands instead.
"No one has ever meant as much to me as you do, Kam. I've, I've never really had someone I could truly call a friend before. I'm not used to it." Puck looked up at Kam's face. "I never meant to hurt you. I'm sorry."
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Post by kamaria on Jan 17, 2011 13:47:14 GMT -5
Kamaria shook her head. "I still don't understand how it's possible you've never had real, proper friends before. And I really wish there was some way I could help you with... things. With that damn list. With everything," she said, gently touching Puck's cheek. She ached for her friend.
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Post by puck on Jan 17, 2011 15:38:25 GMT -5
Puck put her hand over Kam's and gave it a light squeeze. There had been some she thought were true friends, but in the end she found out the feelings weren't mutual. Kamaria was the first friend she had that truly considered her a friend in return. She didn't always know how to deal with that.
"I'm trying." Puck replied, giving her friend a small smile. "Its just...hard. Old habits and all that..."
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Post by kamaria on Jan 17, 2011 15:46:00 GMT -5
Kamaria nodded, returning the small smile. "Well, if there's anything I can do to help, anything at all, let me know." And she meant it. She'd be happy to shake Puck on a daily basis and tell her how wonderful she is, and how important their friendship is to Kamaria, if that's what's needed.
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Post by puck on Jan 17, 2011 16:02:34 GMT -5
"Thanks." Puck replied, nodding as well. She didn't want to mess up what was finally going right. It was going to be difficult, but something had to change.
Puck leaned forward and gave Kam a hug, lightly nuzzling her shoulder.
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Post by kamaria on Jan 17, 2011 16:18:01 GMT -5
Kamaria said nothing, and just wrapped her arms around Puck, hugging her close.
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Post by Quaxo on Jan 18, 2011 16:15:46 GMT -5
Quaxo smiled, this time genuinely, having sat quietly for their conversation. "Good," he said simply, before collapsing back onto his bed, "good."
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Post by puck on Jan 18, 2011 17:00:46 GMT -5
Puck glanced over at Quaxo. "Think we should let him sleep?" she asked Kamaria, playfully poking him in the side. "He looks about dead."
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Post by kamaria on Jan 18, 2011 17:06:37 GMT -5
Kamaria smiled and glanced at Quaxo. He did indeed look utterly exhausted.
"Yeah, might be a good idea to leave him be," she said with a small nod.
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Post by Quaxo on Jan 19, 2011 12:26:37 GMT -5
He twitched a bit at Puck's poke but not much more than that. He really was exhausted, and at this point he was barely conscious, he couldn't have kept his eyes open if he wanted to.
He tried to force words out but only managed another, "good," before losing consciousness entirely.
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Post by puck on Jan 19, 2011 12:38:03 GMT -5
Puck shook her head at Quaxo, a smile on her face. "Well, I guess that answers my question." She stood and pulled the blanket over him again. "Come on, lets let him sleep."
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Post by kamaria on Jan 19, 2011 12:41:01 GMT -5
Kamaria smiled and nodded, and then stood up, careful not to stir the sleeping tom.
"Poor thing, I guess even in sleep we were affecting him. I hope he'll get a good nap once we're outta here," she said, glancing down at him. Poor thing.
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Post by puck on Jan 19, 2011 12:48:17 GMT -5
"I'm sure he will."
Puck linked arms with her friend and grinned, a mischievous glint in her eye. "Come on, lets find some trouble to cause."
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Post by kamaria on Jan 19, 2011 13:10:01 GMT -5
Kamaria grinned at Puck, and followed her out of Quaxo's den. "Let's!" she said happily. Her mind was still on their conversation, though. She really did want to help Puck in any way she could. Maybe right now shenanigans was the way to go. She wouldn't object to that, for sure. [aaand end thread. Will continue over here]
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